Sheena Yap Chan is a keynote speaker, podcaster and consultant dedicated to empowering women. Author of the bestselling book, The Tao of SelfConfidence, she is on a mission to foster stronger, more authentic representation for women and to equip them with the confidence to lead unapologetically. Here is an exclusive extract from her forthcoming book, Bridging the Confidence Gap: How Empowered Women Change the World

IDENTIFY YOUR STRENGTHS

Being a woman isn’t easy when you feel like you have to do everything yourself because society told you that you are ‘Superwoman’.

But it’s important to know what your strengths are so you can focus on them. You have been good at some things at different points in your life, correct?

One of the things I have done was to create a badass list of the things that I have accomplished that I can always turn to when I have bad days.

Creating a badass list will give you the motivation to work on yourself and your courage.

If you have been successful at something, remember the things you did to make that happen and see if you can transfer what you did to future situations.

By focusing and working on your strengths, you are more likely to:

■ take action;

■ be happier;

■ increase your confidence and courage;

■ be less depressed; and

■ have greater resilience.

But what if you don’t even know what your strengths are?

No worries, there are many ways to find out your strengths.

One way to start identifying your strengths is to take a strengths test, and you can find many strengths tests online.

A popular one that many executives take is the CliftonStrengths, created by Gallup.

There is a fee to take it but it does give you a very detailed assessment at the end.

Doing a test like this can help you focus on what you are good at and start taking action. Another way you can identify your strengths is to ask your family and friends to write down what they think your strengths are.

There are also various support systems, tools and resources that can help you identify your strengths, such as character strength worksheets, reading books on this topic or attending workshops related to identifying your strengths.

PRACTICE MAKES PROGRESS

It’s important to practise having courage. In the beginning, it will feel uncomfortable and awkward because it’s something new to you.

But the more you keep practising it, the more comfortable it will feel and the better you become at it.

How do you practise courage? Start small. Find small acts of courage that you are able to tackle. It can be as simple as wearing a new colour in your wardrobe or learning a new hobby.

Learning to be brave doesn’t require a big gesture.

One of the biggest (small) ways I was able to build courage was learning to be on video. This really scared me, so I delayed doing it so many times before I finally decided to press the record button.

The first time I recorded myself on video, it was a hot mess. It took me two hours to record a two-minute video. But I did it.

The more I kept recording videos of myself, the better I became at being on camera and that fear started to go away.

Being able to practise courage every day allows you to be prepared for the moments in your life that you cannot control, like the pandemic.

That was a huge change for everyone and the ones who came out of it winning were the people who knew how to find ways to overcome this fear of the unknown and had the courage to pivot their businesses or even to start new business ventures.

IT’S OKAY TO FAIL

Failure is not easy, especially when you are told that failure is bad for you.

In fact, it’s the total opposite.

Failure is a great way to help you build your courage — because life can be tough and failure teaches you to pick yourself back up in any situation, learn from your mistakes, and find solutions to move forward.

There will be times in your life where the actions you take will make you question your path.

It also doesn’t help that people rarely share their failures.

The most successful people in the world have gone through many failures en route to getting to where they are today.

I think knowing the failures endured by successful people can help you realise that you are not alone in this journey.

I also have had my fair share of failures over the years, from the time I failed kindergarten for colouring outside the lines of my photo to failing in parts of my entrepreneurial journey.

Bridging the Confidence Gap: How Empowered Women Change the World by Sheena Yap Chan will be published by Wiley in May (€25.50)